Loving and Living the Quran

Three keys to living a life of Ihsan (cont.)

Key 3: Pardon and forgive- Understanding God’s forgiveness

  • Ghaffar- He who forgives the quantity of sins.
  • Ghafoor- He who forgives the quality of sins.
  • Al-'Afuw- He who removes the ill effects of sins.

These are the same qualities that one must apply in their relationships with others.

Types of forgiveness:

  • Situational forgiveness- when one moves on from a situation that causes them turmoil.
  • Dispositional forgiveness- pardon, forgive and overlook others for their shortcomings.

Motivation for change- inspiration from the Quran and Hadith:

  • Continuously remind oneself that forgiving others gives access to His mercy.
  • To attain God’s forgiveness one must forgive his fellow human beings.
  • Assume that everyone has at least as good intentions as oneself. 
  • Psychologists and ulema both explain that forgiveness is an inner freedom.
  • God transforms bad deeds into good deeds- forgive and promote if someone admits a mistake.
  • A momin is obsessed with his own shortcomings, not with those of others. 

Difference between anger and resentment:

  • Anger: is a quick emotion. It is a fire that goes out quite quickly.
  • Resentment: a persistent feeling of upset towards a situation. It’s similar to hot burning coals that continue to smoulder long after.

What we hold on to costs us emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

Barriers to forgiveness:

  • Not recognizing the cost to one’s well-being.
  • Fear of condoning hurtful behaviour.
  • Belief that “they should pay for it.”
  • Lack of skills in coping with anger.

What is forgiveness?

  • Forgiveness does not mean condoning another’s behaviour.
  • It’s a change in feelings and attitudes regarding what happened.
  • Letting go of negative emotions such as taking revenge.
  • There is no desire to make the other person suffer anymore.
  • There is an increased ability to wish the other person well. 
  • Results in spiritual expansion and closer proximity to God.




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Direct download: media.io_8th_muharram.mp3
Category:Muharram Lectures -- posted at: 2:48pm EDT

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